Happy New Year everybody! I haven’t posted in a long while because I’ve been busy giving genealogy webinars, managing a child in remote learning, and going back to work myself.
The silver lining during the past year has been the webinars I’ve launched. I’ve seen an amazing response and more are to come. I plan to ask a few of my friends to join me for joint webinars, add workshops, and even some classes.
Now, on to today’s topic.
How many living descendants have you connected with since you’ve been researching your family?
If the answer is none, you are missing out on information that no database or repository can ever tell you.
A Surprise
One of the surprising things about this research for me has been discovering how few people actually had children. As a rough estimate, I’d say about 40% of my ancestors (including collateral) did not have children.
For example:
–Out of 12 surviving children of Levi and Beatrice Prather only 4 had children.
–Out of the 8 children of John & Mary Holt, only 5 had children.
–Out of the 7 children of Walter & Effie Springer, only 4 had children.
–Out of the 3 sons of David and Anna Crowder, none had children.
Considerations
My grandmother told us that her brothers were in Okinawa during World War II. She believed they were exposed to chemical agents while there and this explained the fact that they could not have children. I am sure that was her best guess, and I have no idea if that is true.
In the past, they didn’t have the fertility clinics we have today to determine the real reasons for infertility. I imagine that many of those couples wanted children. It must have been difficult to be married for decades and not know why, as a couple, they could not conceive.
Many families unofficially adopted children, as was common practice in earlier times. Particularly with the high mortality rate, siblings and grandparents are often found in census records raising orphaned children.
The 1940 census
So when I find someone I in the 1940 census who has children, I turn into a madwoman. My hope is to find descendants and reconnect our families. I can’t tell you how rewarding and successful this has been for me.
The sources I use for this are relatively few:
- Obituaries
- Online whitepages and people search websites
- Ancestry’s US, Phone and Addresses database
- Death certificates
- Google, Bing, Yahoo & Other search engines
Finding Simpson Family
For my Simpson line, the obituary of a man who died in 1994 listed his surviving daughters (with their married names) and the cities where they lived.
Given that, I scoured online whitespages, zabasearch and similar sites for addresses and numbers. The Ancestry Phone and Addresses database is also helpful, as is just searching the person’s name in Google or other search engines.
I often call every number I find online, but many of them are no good. Then I send postcards explaining my relationship, and try to assure them I am not some crackpot stalker;)
In this case, one card landed successfully with my newfound dear cousin Wanda. She was thrilled to connect our families, and she came with a wealth of knowledge, oral history & family photographs. She and my father are second cousins. Lucky me!
In a similar fashion, about six years ago, I found living descendants on this same Simpson family line. I can’t tell you how thrilled I was when they attended our family reunion (at my invitation) and brought the photo albums filled with historic photos. They later invited me to dinner where we exchanged even more stories and photographs and research.
Finding Waters Family
That same process led me to connect with another cousin, Edwin, from my Eastern Shore of Maryland Waters line. He attended my alma mater, Morgan State!
He also is the first cousin I’ve met that grew up in the historic community of Upper Fairmount. His memory, records, photographs and kindness make me so happy we’ve met. What a sweetheart he is, in all the best ways.
In the picture below, Edwin gave myself and another DNA cousin a tour of the community, churches and cemetery in Upper Fairmount (today called Upper Hill).
Below are two of the many beautiful community pictures he shared with me. Outside pictures are rare so I am always thrilled see these:
A Few Tips
In 1940 if there were multiple children, you’ll have better luck finding those with less common names. Men are easier to find since their names don’t change. With death certificates, the informant’s address may be provided, and they are likely a relative.
Overall, I’d say finding as many obituaries as possible has been the biggest help. Obituaries uncover the married names of descendants and usually the cities they lived in.
Also, if they have a public or more high-profile occupation, you may find a person you seek named on the websites of those jobs. That’s why the Internet searches are useful.
There are numerous genealogy lectures available online at sites such as Legacy Family Webinars about finding living descendants. They detail many more ways to find people, but the sources I listed above are what has worked for me.
Closing Thoughts
Of course this process isn’t always successful. Addresses are old, postcards are returned.
Everyone you find may not respond or may not be interested in family history.
But the many benefits of finding descendants have far outweighed that small number who are not interested.
In the comments, I’d love to hear from you on ways you found living descendants and how that discovery impacted your research.
Postscript: About 2 weeks ago I discovered a branch of descendants I’ve been seeking for 15 years! The whole family joined me for a two-hour Zoom call, and we are all just elated.
I am an engineer by day, but my true passion lies in genealogy. I have been a researcher, writer, lecturer and teacher for over twenty years. This blog is where I share family history methods, resources, tips and advice, with an emphasis on slave research, slavery and its aftermath. This lifelong quest has helped me to better know my family’s past. I’ve taken back– reclaimed– some of that lost memory, especially that of my enslaved ancestors. I hope you’ll sign up to receive my posts—if you do, you’ll get a free PDF with some of my favorite tips! And please do share posts that interest you.
Robyn, as usual ,your posts always give me something else to think about. I just need to follow through with what I have. I MUST take the time to do that. Thanks for sharing such great information and skills.
Thank you for taking the time to comment, mamacita!
Babycita
Hi Robyn, I am fairly new to your blog and very happy to be here. I got so excited reading your last post because I uncovered many relatives in a similar way. Whenever I get to a dead end on my dad’s side, I’ll switch to my mom’s and vice versa. So I was intrigued because one relative that I was working on had connections to both my dad and mom. I knew if I spoke to this relative then I would find out information on both sides. I looked up her information in white pages but it was disconnected so I searched the white pages for possible relatives and I found several. I decided to contact one of them , found her on facebook then on confirmed her info on linkedin. I reached out to her and discovered that this person of interest her deceased grandmother. This one person connected me with a family member who in turn connected me with three sets of family members at one time plus information on my mom’s family. My phone was ringing off the hook all day as more new relatives started calling from all over the US. I was even able to give them info from my research concerning the family that they didn’t know. I’m still working on connecting with more family members. Just one person was all I need to move forward in a stagnated search. My only regret is that I started this search in my 50’s and I missed opportunities to speak to older family members before they passed away but it’s never too later to uncover your ancestry. My dad is 86 and has been a great resource for both sides of my family. We speak for hours almost everyday as I try to get all the information from him that I can. So glad I discovered your blog.
Hi Lisa,
Thank you for sharing that success story. All you need is one person and they can unlock the connection to many others, as you show. That has happened to me many times. I just wanted to remind people in this post to spend some time finding those descendants and I’m glad it has been successful for you. And don’t feel bad you started in your 50s–some people don’t start until their 60s or 70s. Its enough and better than never doing it at all.
Thanks for writing,
Robyn
Hi Robyn! I noticed above you mentioned being related to the Simpson Family.
My Simpson family is from Attala County, Mississippi. Our oldest known relatives are Eliza Thur and Bill Simpson (born about 1845.
Donna
Hi Donna,
More Simpsons! I love it. Lots of folks from Maryland got sold to the deep south so you never know. Let me know if our DNA ends up matching;)
Robyn
Hotep Robyn,
As usual, you prove clear guidance in your stories and tips. Thanks for your commitment to the ancestral community. You continue to make a difference for those who seek knowledge and understanding of their family, therefore themselves.
Gene,
Thank you for that very kind compliment. My passion for uncovering and telling our stories is only matched by helping others to do the same. Any little bit I can add that is helpful brings me such joy.
Robyn
I was able to confirm my great-grandparents names by following up on a name I saw on a letter at a relative’s home. I recognized the name on the return address of an envelope I saw lying on a table. I believed it was a first cousin to my dad. I decided to copy the info & write her, introduce myself & my efforts to research the family. As it turned out, she was very receptive! She had actually lived with my great- grandmother as a child, could describe her appearance & personality and had heard her speak of HER parents. This was allowed me to go back another generation. This isn’t a particular research technique. Just always having the anntenae up and being willing to pounce on any possible lead. The relative in whose home I spied the envelope in, had never mentioned this cousin and was not as forthcoming with family hx.
Hi Karen,
That is the skill that will continue to payoff big time in your research. I can only imagine! It’s exciting to find someone who is also excited about making the connection. Finding someone who knew your long-ago ancestors cannot be matched. Thanks for sharing!
Robyn